Tuesday, December 27, 2005

6 weeks to go

Well Christmas is finally over and done with. Yay, it went reasonably hassle free, but I think there is someone that ruins every family occasion in each family. Our person just happens to be a grumpy 84 year old man who throws a wobbly because he is not centre of attention over a three year old. You would think that at 84 you would be used to children taking the limelight but never mind the rest of the day went well and I enjoyed spending time with my family.
My darling mother brought me the video of 'the Grinch who stole Christmas', because of my attitude towards Christmas before hand. Everyone got a good laugh out of it.

With some help of a couple of wonderful people we got the first coat of paint on the babies room yesterday and will be completing the rest today. The paint looks so good it has brightened up the room and I think for the first time I noticed some sun coming through the window (that might have had something to do with the fact that I was up at 6.30 which I'm not usually)
Last week my mother and I decided to go to off the track which is a second hand curtain place, just for a look, well we found the perfect curtains for the room for only $55, they are perfect. After we had the first coat of paint on the walls we got Warwick to do a curtain dance and hold them up to see how they look, they look great.

Baby seems to be growing well and mooned most of my family on Christmas day. After eating on Christmas day the space for baby became a bit limited so she got herself into a position where her bum was sticking out of the top of my belly just under my rib cage, which gave everyone another good laugh at me but never mind.
I'm still throwing up a bit and I am trying to fight off a man cold, you know the whole I'm dying thing.

We had Alyssa as the present giver on Christmas day, which was wonderful except you would give her a present and tell her to give it to someone and she would open it for them on the way have a good look at the present and decide whether it was good enough to give to that person, and after inspection give them the present, some people especially 84 year men did not take to kindly to their present being opened for them, but Lyssa had fun and she was so cute.

Thank you to all of you who have helped us or had us in your prayers, I've come out of my low mood and am starting to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Low week

I haven't written anything on my blog for a while because I've had a really low week. With everything going on and pregnancy hormones I have been a mess. My husband has nick named me the grinch because I don't want anything to do with Christmas or his birthday, I didn't even want to put up a Christmas tree this year. I just want to crawl into a hole for the next eight weeks and come out when the baby is born and everything is finished and over and done with.

Last week we finally cleaned out the babies room and pulled up the carpet, which to our surprise wasn't even tacked down. This carpet was horrible and looked rotten and smelt musty, we thought the floor underneath this carpet would be rotten and need replacing, but when we lifted the carpet the floor was beautifully polished rimu. The thought that went through my head was why on earth would you put ugly carpet on polished rimu floors.

Our financial struggle has been what has hit me the hardest. This week we got a lot less than what we normally get on a student allowance, the funny thing is Warwick has been working and it still doesn't meet to what we would be getting if we got a benefit over the holidays. The problem with that is Warwick and I like to work for our money, and we don't feel guilty because here we sitting on our chuffs quite capable of working getting money from the government, when the money could be better spent elsewhere.

I wanted to buy Alyssa a trampoline for Christmas but because of where we are at I have had to put the money onto other things. Alyssa doesn't mind, but its my disappointment in myself that she has to miss out.

Everything else is just sitting on top of me weighing me down. What a terrible time of year there is so much going on and so much stress on people. I never want to forget the birth of Jesus and the significance of that but I could quite easily through away the rest of Christmas cos that would be one less thing I have to deal with.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

31 weeks

9 weeks to go.
Babies room: Well I still haven't even started to tidy it or clear it out, so painting is still a while off.
Leg cramps: Seem to be gone for now
Morning sickness: Seems to be returning
Body: Muscles becoming sore in lower abdomen
Car: Starting to struggle to get out of it
Alyssa gets frustrated its taking me longer to get out of the car so she climbs over the seat and pushes me out of the way.

Everything seems to be better this week Warwick has been working at the toilet duck factory, which he hates so he is trying a driving job at a timber yard. I haven't had any work this week and have enjoyed every minute of it.
It has been quite good I have had no work as Alyssa has had a nasty cold so I have stayed home with her all week, the great thing is at this stage I don't have the cold but Warwick does and he has lost his voice, so if anyone wants to hasstle him now is the time to do it because he can't answer back. Ha Ha

Its funny how no one talks to one another while waiting in a check out queue. I was in whittcouls yesterday and there was quite a long queue. No one was saying anything and minding there own business. Now I don't know what went through Alyssa's head but she wasn't going to stand for that, she started talking the the checkout girl, then the lady behind me, then the lady beside me. Well I am a shy person I don't like much attention but Alyssa makes sure that people notice both of us, all these ladies were talking back to her and saying how friendly and delightful she is, because of this I was forced to make polite conversation. Alyssa is probably doing me the world of good in that respect I just wish she wouldn't pick such public places.
My husband on the other loves the attention Alyssa brings and laps up every ounce of it, where as I would rather hide and have no one notice me.

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Putting things into perspective

In righteousness you will be established: Tyranny will be far from you; You will have nothing to fear. Terror will be far removed; it will not come near you.
If anyone does attack you, it not will be my doing; Whoever attacks you will surrender to you.
Isaiah 54:14-15

I was talking to a friend yesterday who helped me put things into perspective. It was so refreshing having someone older and wiser to talk to.
While I was praying with her I felt an overwhelming peace, God reminded me he had been with me from the start of this pregnancy and that he is in control.

I feel God is the one who told me it was time to have another child. I had a very vivid dream one night about childbirth and when I woke up I felt God say its time. My husband and I had not been trying because I didn't think I was ready for another child yet. But within 2 weeks of that dream it was confirmed I was pregnant. The comfort is that God will never give you more than you can handle, so if he said "it's time" then I must be able to handle it, with his help.

My 3 year old is extremely active, always on the go and she can be very tiring. She is very delightful and always happy. Yesterday in church when the pastor was praying, Alyssa decided because everyone was quiet that she would sing happy birthday Lyssa at the top of her lungs.
You got to love her.
My friend I was speaking to yesterday helped me realise that she is not naughty or bad she is just being Alyssa. Also to break the words that are spoken over often such as she has A.D.D and that she is a handful, and allow her to be what God wants her to be rather than what everyone else says she is.
I don't believe Alyssa has A.D.D she is not destructive and she does listen to you and do what you say most of the time, she is just full of beans.

I feel as though God has control of my life now, and I believe he is with me and my family as we go through this time of change. Praise God for his faithfulness, he never fails

Thursday, December 01, 2005

30 Weeks

Well I have reached 30 weeks of pregnancy, which means 10 weeks to go. The reality is really starting to hit.
The babies room is full of junk, I mean you can barely open the door. So in ten weeks as well as dealing with Christmas and my husbands 30th, we have to clean out the room and paint it from top to bottom, put the new carpet in and find new curtains. As well as this we have to find the money for the paint and curtains. We have ceiling paint and paint for the windows left over from Alyssa's room but its the colour paint we need. Now if you have ever seen this room you will know why it needs to be painted and carpeted before it is inhabited.

My husband is doing temp work at the moment and there is no guarantee that he will have work every day right through. I also don't know how much longer I can work because the weight of this big belly is straining my back. So its a time we really have to trust in God.

Having a c-section last time didn't seem to effect me until this pregnancy, but the further through I get the more anxious I get about the birth. Also with a c-section you don't get to hold your baby until they have finished stiching you up. With Alyssa it them 10 minutes to get her out and 40 mins to sew me back up. That was forty mins that I couldn't hold my new born baby, I could only hold her hand.
I want to be the first one to hold this baby.
Also I missed out on giving Alyssa her first bath, because she had really bad wind and the midwife in the hospital took her for a bath to see if it would release some of the wind, while I slept. It didn't bother until now thinking about this baby and I want to the first one to bath this baby.

Its weird how things that haven't bothered you for three years are the things that haunt you the most when its time to go through them again.

I have also started experiencing leg cramps, now I'm a lucky person I have never broken a bone, dislocated anything, had stiches (except for my c-section scar) or even a bleeding nose (until my lovely daughter head butted me a few weeks ago) I had never had leg cramp either but yesterday when my husband arrived home from work, he woke me up, (I was having an afternoon nap) I moved my leg and got the most intense pain that wouldn't go away. The sharp pain left me screaming and it lasted at least five mins (no joke) the muscle in that leg is still sore now and I have been limping for almost a day because of it.
This morning when my husband woke me up, my other leg decided it would be fun to cramp. Luckily this one only lasted about 30 secs, didn't hurt anywhere near as much and my muscle is no longer sore. Maybe my husband should stop waking me up.

All and all I am coping but things are just starting to panic me a bit.